Britain’s got what exactly?

4 05 2008

Whilst watching the repeat of Britain’s Got Talent, I think we witnessed a small petit mal within the world of culture today. The boy singing Miss Saigon was ace but seriously, surely the woman in the audience at the end deserved a bigger round of applause? Who stands up waving their arms in the air and does a side-to-side booby dance? On national TV? With their bra showing through something that resembled gold lamé bogroll? I suspect though, that if people are now converted into going to the opera and theatre, they’ll be peeved that no one really jumps off stage into the audience and confused as to why it’s not really à la mode to flail their arms around at the end of the show like a harpooned manatee.

I’m not going to comment on specific acts, but come on – do most of those people really think the Queen wants to watch them squeezed into an impossibly tight sequined costume? Still, I’m not one to crush anyone’s dreams, and I’m no Cowell, so GO FOR IT! And keep it coming so we can have a good laugh from behind the sofa. Having said that, I really don’t want to see another lispy, milk dribbling, gap-toothed child spouting out some saccharine drivel, and getting through just by virtue of being a child. Children are only endearing if they are your own, or at most belong to your best friend. The Shirley Temple look went out in the 1930s, and last year I was rooting much more for the guy twirling those big sticks. So, nehhhhh….

Anyway, Wayne Palmer has gone totally doo-lally in 24 – now that is culture!

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